It's Not Chance's Fault!!

Everyone blames Chance for our current living arrangement. They say he needs a better-paying job, he needs to support his family better, he needs to take responsibility. I wish people would step back, look at the situation, and point the fingers at who's really to blame: his Mother. She is the one who came in here and took the house that we paid for for 3 years right out from under us, ruining our next 3 years of planning. If we had had a contract she wouldn't be able to do that, she'd have owed us money or something. We were trying to have a second child, and now if we did we have nowhere to put it. We had all these plans and ideas for the house, and when they finally started moving her stuff out suddenly it all falls through and they move back in and just shove us outta the way, hide us in a tiny bedroom with all our belongings, to get us outta their way. They didn't give a shit that they ruined our planning, dashed our hopes, and basically kicked us out. They want us to move completely out of here, to live in a run-down trailer that has been infested by cats and rats and various other critters, with their feces everywhere and moldy floors we could eventually fall through with daily use.
She doesn't care that she has come in and moved us out of our way. She shoves my things to the back of the cabinets to fill them with her things. She can't keep her son out of our stuff, forcing us to hide things in our room in an effort to save us money since she won't replace anything he steals or breaks. She breaks my dishes and doesn't tell me, choosing to let me believe it's just lost. She ruins my pans and cookie sheets, letting them sit with disgusting, moldy food until it becomes easier to throw them out than clean them and hope the rust isn't permanent. She has no respect for me as an adult and consistently undermines my authority with my own daughter, getting to a point where it's easier to lock us in our room. They have pretty much taken over our wii to a point where we can't watch what we want when they are in the room or can gear it where ever they happen to be, and we have to wait until they go to bed to watch it at all.
Chance keeps telling me to be mindful of what I say when shes in the house, because she can hear us even when she's asleep, so I pretty much cannot voice my opinion on anything, because he doesn't want to ripple the water. I keep telling him we have a tidal wave coming and the dam he's built isn't going to hold it back long, but we have no other options. I'm not even allowed to vent my frustrations online, for fear something gets back to his mother. Hell, he will probably tell me I can't do it on my phone either, because she might one day find it and go through my phone, and then confront us with her apparent 'notepad of doom'.
They are expecting us to pay the phone bill, the power bill, and a portion of the rent every month, but want to keep us cramped into one small bedroom. The kitchen is utterly destroyed every night with so many dirty dishes and pots and pans and expect us to clean up after them.

I'm an Adult, Too!!

She doesn't even have the respect for me as an adult to confront me directly about any arising issues, but rather, she talks to Chance about her problems with me, much like a parent discussing their issues with a fellow parent's child, expecting them to handle the situation.

I know I am aggressive in this situation, but it's because at this point, I feel as if I have no control over my life, over anything at present. Everything is out of my hands and I'm not even allowed an opinion on it. When I do voice my opinion in public, I get in trouble with my husband, as if I am a child. I feel like no one has any respect for me as an adult, and the safest thing for me to do is lock myself in my room, much like an insolent teenager. It's almost easier to surrender and continue being treated as a child versus making futile attempts at being an adult. I don't even get a say over what is watched on television when anyone else is in the room.

I know if I continue to act like an insolent teenager I will continue to be treated as such, but even when I make attempts to act like an adult people still continue to treat me as they would someone younger, or more child-like, then themselves. I'm not sure anyone, even my own husband, sees me as an adult.

Everyone says when you act like a child, you get treated like a child. I know some of my actions are childish or immature (like taking down all of our pictures in the living room, even though we know she'll either do it herself or ask us to eventually anyway) but I felt I was just acting preemptively, not childishly.

It doesn't matter; no one cares what I do, say, or think anyway.

A Ranting on My Current (Horribly Unfair) Living Situation

I want my own place where I can have friends and family over and some other person isn't embarrassed at the state of the house or inconvenienced because there are guests they didn't invite and/or want here. I want to be able to have candles burning and not have to worry about a child messing with the flames because my child knows better but other children aren't as behaved as mine. I want to be able to have my scented oil plug ins without fear of a child messing with it or pouring them out. I want to not have to worry about putting pants on or covering up when I exit my bedroom because there would be no one to be offended by my pantslessness. I want my daughter to have her own room with her own bed that we can decorate however we want and it not interfere with anyone else's wants or desires. I want Shayla to be able to play with her toys wherever she wants in the house without fear of them getting lost in or mixed up with another child's toys. Shayla should be allowed to have her tent or tents set up and able to play whenever she wants without interfering with or getting in the way of anyone else. I want my own kitchen that no one messes with or cooks in but me. I don't want to worry about not having cleaned the kitchen the night before and it interfering with someone else. I want to have my own decorations and my own furniture in my living room. I want to watch what I want, when I want on my tv without worrying about someone else's opinion on my show and the effects of the show on other peoples children. I'm an adult, I should be able to do as I wish in my own home without worrying about upsetting another adult who thinks they are my parent when they aren't nor have they any right to attempt to parent me. The way I live my life and raise my child is no one's business but my own and my husband's. It shouldn't affect anyone besides us, and no one has a right to interfere in that process. Our elders make suggestions, due to their experience and knowledge on child rearing, but we have the right to not follow their suggestions and raise our child our own way. If I wanna spend all day sitting on my butt playing on the computer and playing with Shayla and not doing anything around the house, I should be able to without judgement from others (aside from my husband).